Let me sum this up in a series of dates:
- January 8th – My grandmother died of an ‘unidentified viral pneumonia’ whether it was the ‘rona we’ll never know because they weren’t even testing for it then. It was on China’s radar and was more than likely already here, but again, we’ll never know.
I know. It sucks. She was my last living grandparent. This was just the beginning, though…
- February 8th – My ‘Uncle’ Hardy died from lung cancer. I put uncle in air quotes because he was actually a cousin by marriage, he married my ‘Aunt’ Jewell who is actually my mom’s first cousin but they were so similar in age that for me all throughout my childhood, she was always known as ‘Aunt Jewell’ and Hardy was, by default, ‘Uncle’ Hardy.
But wait, there’s more…
- February 9th – that’s right, the day after my uncle died which was one month to the day my grandmother died, I caught my husband cheating in one of the worst ways possible.
- February 12th – My husband moved out. Insult to injury, it also happened to be my stepson’s birthday.
The universe was seriously not done with me yet. I had a lawyer draw up divorce papers but had to wait for my coffers to replenish so I could actually file.
- March 16th – This also happens to be our wedding anniversary – I finally had enough money to file for divorce. That’s right. I filed for a divorce on my wedding anniversary.
To say that 2020 has been utterly devastating is a vast understatement. Add to the personal tragedies stacking up like cordwood the political situation, general unrest, then slap the fact I live in the freaking U.S. epicenter (King County, Washington) of the COVID-19 outbreak my mental health has just absolutely been living in the shitter.
I needed to take a step back and rally. Lick my wounds, as it were, and so I did. I’m creeping back out of my hidey hole slowly but surely here and I feel like I owe you all an explanation for where I’ve been. I just needed to do me for a while and I can’t even tell you what my ‘new normal’ is going to be like because I had literally zero adjustment period before the ‘Stay At Home’ order was slapped on me by this damn virus.
I’m still trying to figure out / waiting to see what that looks like.
Anyway, thanks for reading this long-ass gripey post and for letting me get that off my chest. I’m sorry I just disappeared, but it’s what I do when things get heavy. I hope that virus aside, the rest of you are having a decent enough 2020.
Take care of each other. Hug your spouse.
Peace out, for now.